Monday, November 23, 2009

Me and my men (Part I)

I have a special relationship with men and this is a write-up in celebration to such wonderful connections.

My first connection being with my father.
My father has been the most influential figure of my early years and an unseen bond was forged since then. Presently, there is not much of a conversation or connect with him but I strongly believe that I can talk things through to him for the most important aspects in my life, though with certain levels of inhibitions. But I owe it to him to a certain level for what I am today. His integrity, honesty, straightforwardness, spiritual affinity and of course some of his negative traits too have been inherited by me.

My first friend was Pritam- the sweet memories I hold of him is of a dirty face and a perennial leaky nose and a cold induced voice. He was my dearest childhood friend, I remember him from my age of two till we left for another residence in a different town at the age of five. I used to spend my afternoons with him roaming the ally of our chawl (small houses built in rows). We used to go to the nearby well and stare at the water below to have a glimpse of the turtle that resided there or watch the brick workers as they made bricks out of red mud. Or play with his baby sister as their mother went shopping. I can never forget him till the day I die, hope he remembers me.

When we shifted our residence (I still live in the same place for the past 26 years) and as I went to primary school, I made friends with anyone who sat near my seat. As I was an introvert and didn’t talk much except in my mind, my friendships remained with them only for that current year. We have a few boys in our own building, with them I played but didn’t really have any close bonds.

College wasn’t any different- I was always a stickler for one to one friendship rather than to be a part of a group. That is a reason why it was difficult to belong anywhere in the social structure around me. I remained independent and a self made loner throughout my early social life due to this. I made few guy friends in collage but nothing significant except to spend time and talk about studies our career future our frustrations and the general girlfriend issues they had. As I never had a boyfriend, all the agonies of my friends became a part of my job profile as a confidant, consoler and a counselor, turning me into an agony aunt for ever. But this too had a upside. I got to know men some more as they shared their seceret inhibitions and venrabilities.

My work place social scenario was similar to my collage days and my current profession as a preschool teacher has very bleak chances of me socializing with the opposite sex as all my colleagues are women.

I used to pride myself for being branded- "a guys best pal, being one of them, as good as a guy" and  I always ended up exhibiting my machoiestic side of personality just to keep the image going. But something changed suddenly one day. Two years back, we had a teacher’s picnic in the first week of October to a water park. Will talk about it in the second part